the deleted scenes

while rummaging through old dark files on the old comp, i stumbled upon some, deleted scenes i suppose you could say. for one reason or another they just never ended up getting posted. it's nothing exciting and for all i know i could have said this crap yesterday. on with it.

so here is where i got to in my movie quest. i have seen 97 of the 100 greatest movies of all time (afi). the three i haven't seen are the african queen, the jazz singer, and the third man. i've seen every academy award best picture winner back to 1927 except for you can't take it with you. and there are two movies, gideon's trumpet and the vanishing, that i simply wanted to see but haven't. i haven't because the video stores around don't seem to have them. i'm sure i could dig a little harder or join some other club and find these last six, but i'm happy with the results of my lofty quest. god bless ted turner because so many of the classics in these lists looked as though he got rights to them and made sure they were released on vhs or dvd. i know that there is a turner classics station, so maybe i should start watching that.

i’ve driven myself through these lists and at the same time have come across a number of movies not found on any of them. they seem worth seeing because they are either interesting sounding or pretty famous for a reason or another. i have decided not to pursue any such endeavors as trying to watch all the movies in the world or just making another list. i’ll keep it to what i’ve seen and just continue to watch new releases. there are other top 100 lists all over the place, but afi is pretty credible enough for my needs. some lists like time’s top 100 contain movies i’ve never even heard of. part of me is tired of watching old movies, but part of me really craves seeing that world gone by, left only today as film. but i think i’ve seen enough of the classics to be somewhat well versed in them. i’ll just stick with my dvds and new releases.

while on my run tonight, a brilliant idea popped in my head which answers the ultimate question of, “what would i do with my life if a large sum of cash fell on my lap?" and i’m talking like millionaire many times over. basically, whatever it would take to never have to work again and live a good life. here is what i would do.

i would take myself, ryan, and tom and kind of form a rock band. sounds gay i know, but i know they would do it at this point in their lives (as would i). we would basically try and create a good band. none of us actually play any of the instruments in a band, so what i would do is hire like the best of the best rockers to give us lessons. we’ll either give up early because we know we suck, or try and start recording and touring. the wives, or hopefully in tom’s case a girlfriend at least [i wrote this prior to the lovely april], would all come with us on tour and be our groupies and if we have kids then we have kids. won’t be a big deal. i think it would be a cool experience to grow up on the road (yes, i know there would be a ton of possible negative impacts it could have on a kid, but it would still be cool). we’d have to discuss what we’d want to do so far as a record label. we’ll probably try and keep it small.

i’m sure people will hear our story and want to try and offer us some kind of reality tv show crap on us. we’d have to turn it down though. if we end up getting famous we will want to do it because of us and not some show. that probably means we’d have to keep real quiet about the whole thing because then people would just come to the shows to see if we were good or not. we would build up small and try and get a fan base first before a bunch of retards start liking us.

of course it’s a huge gamble taking years out of our life to rock out so i’d make sure and make it worth it no matter what to them. i’d prolly do something like pay them $50,000 out of my personal funds for each year in the band. then all profits from the band would be split three ways between us. just know that tom, ryan, and i will tell you that in no way ever is what we would be doing for the money. at least, that wouldn’t be the main reason we would do it. remember, i'm already a millionaire in this fantasy. of course i’ll take any paycheck at the end of the day and so will they, but it's all about the fun in it. i know a few others who could vouch for us. when the band splits after however long it would last, the $50,000 ends and they would keep whatever other money comes in. if any band member splits the band, then the contract must end including the band.

in no way would this be my band. i would make a huge stress that the band belongs to each of us and they own it as much as i do. i’d just be the benefactor.

there are of course conditions which considering my offer to the lads, are very reasonable. i would be lead guitar and lead vocals. and no rolling eyes. first of all, this is my money putting this on so i deserve to reap the greatest benefits. secondly, you all know me and my ego. is that condition really surprising coming from me? i would prefer the lineup to be ryan on bass and tom on drums but i’m willing to let them duke it out. i would have the option to terminate the contract at any time if the band has sucked dry most of my money and my boys are drinking me into bankruptcy.

i’d even want jer in the mix so long as: 1. tom can handle it because tom always seems to have some beef with jeramie; and 2. jer doesn’t spend all our dough on whores, drugs, and guinness.

all of this could only happen right about now since we are all at points in life where this is a possibility.

that about sums it up.